(I’ll update the map tomorrow)

I started in Yemassee, I ended up at a beautiful B&B in Savanna, but inbetween there were some absolutely insane events that caused a great deal of disruption to my day, but luckily ended happily. Let me start at the beginning…

• Today’s Distance (miles): 56
• Time in saddle: 7h 24
• Max/min temp – in full sun (°c): 36°/17°
• Climbing (feet) : 505
• Calories used: 3,129
• Today’s 2nd Breakfast: Grits, eggs, toast, bacon and coffee at Clary’s, Savannah
• Cafe time: 3h 10

All day yesterday, whenever I opened the door to my a/c motel room, the heat outside came in like an invisible intruder, barging past me and filling the room in moments, despite the fan blasting out cold air. I kept the curtains drawn all afternoon, and if I walked close to the window the curtains seemed to be almost vibrating with the heat. The window was in full sun for an hour or so, and when I put my hand on it the glass itself seemed to be losing its solid properties, and becoming flexible to my touch. Is that even possible? Probably just a rest-day-mirage.

2nd breakfast (or what I thought was 2nd breakfast…) came at 31 miles, and not a moment too soon. Unlike the last ride-in-the-dark, this one was busy right from the start, which amazed me, and took a lot of concentration as the road was a popular route towards a big intersection. Once past that, things improved just as the sun woke up.

Then it got worse again. I could have passed the Taj Mahal and I wouldn’t have noticed. I could have passed attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion, or C-beams glittering in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate* and I’d have been none the wiser; that’s how much attention I had to give to riding the South Carolina ‘hard shoulder’. It should have been plain sailing all the way into Savannah, but they were building another lane in the fields beside me and had put cement blocks in the shoulder for miles, halving the space. I was so relieved when I reached the Georgia State Line that I may have said some words that I would not normally have shared in public. It was quite liberating knowing that I could only be heard by the wading birds down by the river. They flew off though, so I may have upset them.

*The usual bag of minstrels to anyone who can name that film. John Mills and his entire family, and Susie (ditto) are excluded by order of the management.

In the background of the picture above you can clearly see a giant road bridge, which appeared to be on my route into town. I was very surprised by this, having thought I’d checked the whole route carefully last night. I was relieved all over again when the blue route curved to the right, and I followed it.

It took me all the way to the Savannah Convention Centre, and I saw that it wasn’t taking me to a bridge at all – it was was making for the Savannah Belle Ferry. I got to the back of the centre but found the route completely blocked by more construction. Asking at the front of the hotel next door, they told me to just skirt round the hotel and the (free) ferry was running as normal. And would I like some iced water for my water bottle?

A ferry day, and I hadn’t even realised. What a bonus. We crossed to the other side and I got out at the famous Savannah Waterfront district.

So I began a bike tour of Savannah, partly planned but mostly just following the interesting streets and incredible houses. Gallery? Why not.

I did have a destination in mind: two, in fact. Firstly the museum at the house where the infamous murder that Midnight In The Garden of Good and Evil is based on took place. Closed Wednesdays. So much for preparing.

The next destination was a great eatery nearby. Although I had technically already had my 2nd breakfast, I decided to downgrade it to 1st breakfast 2.0, and launch the official one at the world-famous Clary’s Café, est 1903. The cafe is best known for its appearance in both the film and the book of Midnight In the Garden of Good and Evil, but would be famous anyway for its superb southern cooking, amazing value and warm welcome.

After I’d finished eating I offered to move myself over to a stool at the bar, as I wanted to carry on drinking coffee and writing, finding the atmosphere great for both (I’ve always loved writing in cafes, at home or away, and for some reason don’t find it distracting but relaxing, which is just as well!). But my waitress wouldn’t hear of it. ‘Oh no! That’s no problem, hun, you just sit tight and I’ll keep your coffee topped up and you stay just as long as you like!’. It was a busy cafe, so I hugely appreciated being made so welcome. One of the waiters kept coming over to my table between serving people, to tell me, in many instalments and in a very sweet manner, the story of his entire family’s emmigration from Ulm, Germany, to Savannah, Georgia. Latest news is that they’ve postponed a trip home until the year after next, due to the football (soccer) Euros 2024 pushing up prices. I sympathised with his travel-schedule-stresses.

So now we come to the more unwelcome and complex events: my short trip to the park.

I decided to stop off at the well-known Forsyth Park right in the centre of Savannah on the way to my Guest House. I cycled through it until I reached a cafe in the middle, Collins Quarter, which had one of those fountains behind it where kids scream and shout and get soaked.

Propping up my bike, I joined them very briefly to soak my bandana. I returned to my bike and dug out a bagel from the camp kitchen, amazing myself that I was still hungry even after 2nd breakfast at Clary’s. I was in shade, and thought I’d take a short film of the fountains, so reached into my handlebar bag for my iPad. Not there. I checked again. Then I began to look in less and less likely places before realising that it was not where it should be. It was pretty obvious by now that either I’d dropped it (very unlikely) or that it had been taken in the few seconds when I had turned my back. I retraced my route quickly, but no sign. I switched on FindMy and waited whilst it searched….ping, there it was, a block or two south, and heading south-er. I jumped on my bike and started pedalling. I reached the location, beside another cafe, went in, looked around, tried a nearby alleyway, then…ping. The screen refreshed, and my ipad had now moved several more blocks away. Wow, I thought, that was quick. I’d better move. It was getting extremely hot by now, but I didn’t seem to appreciate just how much because of my growing alarm about the ipad’s contents and what I’d lost (passwords, blog, archive of photos, aaaargh!). I’m only aware of it now I’m writing this! I kept getting close, wondering what I’d do if I did actually track it down – offer a reward if anyone had ‘found it’?? – but then I looked down at my phone and once more it was magically several more blocks further off. So I made a tough decision: I selected ‘Erase Device’ and pressed ‘Confirm’. It said ‘Erase Pending’, then stopped.

At this point I spotted a Police Squad car. Cycling over to it, I spoke to an officer who was on duty at a city filming location for the day. When I told him my story and explained that I was currently tracking the ipad on my phone, his eyes lit up and he said ‘Great! I’m tied up here but I can still help you Sir – I’ll phone this in and you should just go back to the park cafe and wait for the arrival of another officer’. So that’s what I did. About twenty minutes later, after phoning Susie to explain the problem, I met Officer Johnson. By now, the FindMy app was showing that my iPad had finally finished travelling down the endless blocks of old Savannah and had settled in one place a few miles due west of the park. By now I was thinking, ‘Just get an incident number, try to forget about all of the lost material (aaargh) and claim it on insurance’.

Officer Johnson realised that the place where the ipad had come to rest was in a district that was part of his usual beat, in a fairly derelict parking area that he knew well. He gave me an incident number just in case, but asked me to ‘unerase’ the iPad, which I did (I had no idea that you could!), and he was going to drive straight over to the derelict area and have a look for it. ‘It may well have been with someone on an electric bike. Was it moving faster than you but slower than a car?,’ he asked me. ‘That’s exactly what it was doing. I’m not very fast on this but it kept jumping blocks ahead of me!’ I said. ‘I’ll tell you what,’ he told me, ‘I’ll call you and you can make the iPad ping for us and we’ll see if it’s there’.

Off he went, and I set off for the Guest House as it I was now aware of getting much too hot out in the park. I kept my AirPods in (so many product placements!) and waited for the call. When I arrived, there was no one at the Guest House, so I sat in the aircon (I had a door code) and my phone rang. ‘Hi, I’m there. D’you want to start the ping now?’, he said. So I did. Nothing. No connection. Leaving me still on the phone, he then began a search of the area, focusing on a couple of trucks nearby. I could hear every word as he relayed his search back to base, and asked anyone he met if they’d seen anything. It began to feel as though I was now in an episode of a Police Crime Drama, and was an unusual witness as events unfolded, but began to hate the thought that Officer Johnson might be putting himself in any danger. He began talking to someone, who had a more southern accent and sounded a little eager to please. ‘Yeh, yeah, I think I know what you’re after. Guess what? Someone found an iPad this afternoon. I think they brought it here and threw it in the back. Hang on. It’s locked. We just need to get the guy who has the key.’ (Long wait, people talking, Officer Johnson talking to everyone, a model of calm determination.) ‘’Ok, are you there Ben?’ He asked me. ‘I think it’s here. Wait a minute’ (more noises off), and then he began talking to someone else (anther officer possibly) about his experiences a year or two previously as a member of the US armed forces in Syria, and how he lost his brother in a gunfight. I’m sorry if I’ve got any details wrong, but it was a really extraordinary thing to hear about in the middle of the whole unfolding of the crime-solving, and so hard to follow with all of the crackling and talking.

Finally he said to me, ‘So, this iPad, does it have a grey cover and an Apple logo on the front?’ ‘Yes! But it’s a sticker, not a logo!’ ‘Correct. Ben I have your property here. I’m just gonna bring it over to you at your Guest House. Where is it at again? I keep forgetting.’ I could not believe the lengths he was going to over this, and I also could not thank him enough. ‘You know something, Ben?’ he said to me. ‘I hate paperwork. I hate it. Going out and just sorting this out myself is way better than writing it off and filling in forms for you. And you did a lot of the leg work by chasing it around the city and finding where it was. So you get your iPad back and you get to carry on your trip down the coast of America.’

So here I am now, post-iPad theft and recovery, post-crazy chase across the city at midday, post-shower, post piña colada downed in one, post slightly lazier beer and snacks in my lovely ‘Screenwriter’s Room’, writing this at an antique writing desk, and I’ve made a decision. I really liked Savannah right up until someone robbed me, and I like it again even more now that Officer Johnson has ensured the day has had a very happy ending. So I think I’ll stay another day. My room isn’t free, but the owners have several proprieties in the city and have sorted out another room nearby. Look out, here comes free day 2.0 again! Remember Searsport? Oh, and I just got a message to say that Officer Johnson had used his own mobile to call me and they’d charged him for the long international call. so I’m trying to work out how to repay him…

SPANISH MOSS THAT IS FUNNY:

SIGNS THAT ARE FUNNY